Chicken anyone?

I was on the tube last week heading back to work after getting my brows done and a slovenly looking man sat directly across from me. Normally I wouldn't have paid him any attention because London is filled with lots of slovenly men, but this man smelled really, really good. He smelled like barbeque chicken!! He had a bag full of wings and he sat down and began to devour them one by one. Normally I think it's in bad taste to eat on public transportation--there are lots of people packed into a confined space and your delicious meal might actually be disgusting to someone else and cause them be become nauseous and vomit. But maybe that's just me. Since it was the lunch hour, I figured it was ok for him to be eating his chicken, but after a while it was really gross.

He was eating these chicken wings out of a paper bag that was falling apart. From what I could tell, the wings were just lying inside the bag, not actually inside a container. And his hands were filthy! Not filthy from the bbq sauce, but just plain ol' dirty. He had dirt packed under his finger nails and some sort of black residue all over his fingers. Yes, I was all up in his business like that! He was sucking down these chicken wings like his life depended on it. He would literally stuff an entire wing in his mouth and two seconds later pull out a completely meatless bone. I even saw him pull a piece of the paper bag out of his mouth that had gotten stuck to the chicken wing he had just eaten. A person should never be that hungry! To make it even worse, he was breathing like a crazy bull and panting and moaning like he was in the midst of making sweet love. In three minutes this man ate an entire paper bag of bbq wings and then sucked all the sauce (and black residue) off his dirty little fingers. I'll never look at a bbq wing the same.